In Pursuit of Valis Read online

  The Acts material in TEARS verifies when & where we are. On some level I’ve known for a long time—or else I’ve had divine help.

  I guess the divine power is getting the truth across to people in my writing—in the 5 novels listed above that what we do see is fake, &, in TEARS, what, instead, is actually there, hidden (the world of Acts).

  How to reach the real, inner, hidden world is described in UBIK—retreat back along the platonic form axis. It is fully theoretically & cosmologically set forth in that novel.

  Either I unconsciously knew it, was subliminally told it, or it was a lucky guess. But in view of the larger case—situation—being correctly described, I guess I knew it on an unconscious level—anyhow, it wasn’t a guess. Perhaps 1) I’ve made one of the Greatest Discoveries any human ever made, & put it in my book; or 2) I’ve been let in on one or more Great Esoteric Secrets.

  (1978)

  To repeat myself—all this implies that the intervention re the xerox missive was not just to save me per se from a trap, but to keep my actual identity concealed. Evidently originally I knowingly & deliberately entered this “spurious interpolation” in order to call attention to its counterfeit nature, that I might . assist in destroying it. Cold-pac in UBIK, the floor of the Bevatron in EYE. Polyencephalic fusion in MAZE, the fake past in JOINT, but best of all, the Satanic bogus worlds in STIGMATA, because in STIGMATA the correct source/cause is presented. & then in TEARS the true nature—not of a—but of OUR Satanic spurious interpolation is depicted—as well as its collapse & why (xtianity).

  Yes—in TEARS it is shown, through Felix Buckman’s conversion, what will pull down the BIP & allow transfer of authority: xtian conversion (from Power to Love (agape) this adds to what e.g., STIGMATA has told us; we now know the antidote to the “drug.” (i.e., to the cancer-like bogus interpolation).

  Xtianity is antidote (to a poison). “We need medical assistance.”

  As GRASSHOPPER[171] is to the world—people-in MITHC so the N.T. & TEARS is to us.

  I remember what gave me the idea for JOINT, the reflex of reaching for a light-chain—overhead—when there wasn’t one. This subcortical conditioned response was sensationally escalated in the “car air vent, cooler, moister, higher climate” & beer & he-she of 1974 ... escalated. But of a piece.

  Indeed, I am from elsewhere & elsewhen. The on-off overhead light chain that wasn’t there—that was my first clue ... & (as shown in JOINT) I saw that a time dysfunction—or deception—was what it was all about.

  (1978)

  Like Garson Poole[172] I may have changed my inner reality tape programming, & so saw something different.

  (1978)

  SCANNER as I’ve said before is the other half of TEARS, the inner half. The conditions described in SCANNER explain why we don’t see the conditions described in TEARS, & the conditions described in TEARS account for the conditions in SCANNER. The various books were written in the wrong order. But they can be read in the right order, or anyhow gestalted (if read, they will be gestalted).[ ... ]

  Correct sequence:

  1) SCANNER: Occlusion of our minds, without our being aware of it; loss (forgetfulness) of true identity. v. (7)

  2) TEARS: What our world is really always like which the occlusion is deliberately there to keep us from seeing.

  3) STIGMATA: Who/what deliberately occludes us: the Yaltabaoth Magician evil deity, spinner of spurious worlds creator of illusion & inhabiting, contaminating (unclean presence in these degraded pseudo worlds[)].

  4) MAZE: The negative hallucination M.O.[173] of the occlusion, & reference to Savior who extricates us from a hopeless trap & pseudo world.

  5) UBIK: The salvific entity per se, by name & how its “pan-Sophiaistic” messages come through the trash layers to aid us. Past available within the present.

  6) DO ANDROIDS: A vital theme, that of Mercer & his reality through some sort of mystic identification via empathy. The role of animals. The tomb world. The “Fake-ness” of Fakeness: my “2 slit” logic.[174]

  7) “Impostor”: disinhibiting stimulus restoring blocked memory. (v. (1))

  8) “Faith of...” God, evil, communism, drugs, hallucinations—a montage of many elements.

  9) Every other relevant story & novel, from JOINT to “Remember Wholesale,” “Electric Ant,” “Retreat Syndrome,” etc., not listed in 1) through 8).

  & 10) EYE: Subjective private worlds &, as in “Faith of ...” an evil deity & communism are discussed. Plural worlds which we generate.

  SCANNER is the weary final point: our minds are fucked up. It isn’t just a case of pseudo worlds. This links with 8), “Faith of ...”

  All in all, my writing casts doubt on the fact of (even possibility of) knowing actual reality because our minds have been fucked over. Some evidence (e.g. TEARS) points to the real situation being prison-like—but MAZE & esp. UBIK point to a supernatural salvific interventive power, although STIGMATA seems to say that an evil magician deity is in control of our worlds & heads.

  MITHC is a fascinating adjunct to all this, i.e., to the Gestalt. Fakes are discussed. Alternate universes exist. Fascism is the topic, & a book is reality, which seems to have soine connection with TEARS. MITHC seems to be a subtle, even delicate questioning of, what is real? As if only the 2 books in it, GRASSHOPPER & the I CHING are really the only actual reality. Strange. So MITHC must be listed as 11). But now the order of revelation breaks down. & does MARTIAN TIME-SLIP add anything? Pathological private worlds are presented, & the disintegration of world. So 12).

  & 13): GALACTIC POT HEALER. More about the Salvific deity.

  & 14): PENULTIMATE TRUTH. Lies & Government. Fakes again—always the Fakes.

  But TEARS & SCANNER are crucial in a special sense, because the fictional or phantastic element is virtually lacking; they are obviously semi-mimetic, esp. SCANNER which is explicitly stated to have happened, & in a sense not fiction at all. Does this book, then, seem to say, “Maybe portions of the others are literally real, too?” The author does not now pretend to be writing fiction, & TEARS fits this category as well.

  One critic said that NOW WAIT FOR LAST YEAR seemed to depict the Vietnam War. So maybe it, too, adds something. But for sure we have

  SCANNER occluded minds, not able to see

  TEARS prison world created by

  STIGMATA evil deity who is opposed by

  MAZE salvific entity mysteriously here

  UBIK salvific entity mysteriously here

  ANDROIDS salvific entity mysteriously here

  “Imposter” Fake memory; real ones & true identity restored, v. 1)

  Summary:

  Our minds are occluded, deliberately, so that we can’t see the prison world we’re slaves in, which is created by a powerful magician-like evil deity, who, however, is opposed by a mysterious salvific entity which often takes trash forms, & who will restore our lost real memories. This entity may even be an old wino.

  Drugs, communism & sex & fake plural pathological pseudo worlds are involved, but the puriform salvific entity, as mysterious as quicksilver, will save us in the end & restore us to true human state. We will then cease to be mere reflex machines. This is the summation of my kerygma, spread out throughout my works.

  Briefly, I was Christ. He is not a person but a state of being—& yet somehow also a person. It is mysterious. “Christ has no body now but yours.” I became him, & he me. The macro became the micro (me), & the micro became the macro (him). There was a reciprocal action:

  as if the two traded places. He became a mere human, with human fears (such as of the Romans), & I acquired his 1000s of years of memory & knowledge.

  Maybe that’s why I was in the world of Acts: he is there (i.e., then). This included memory of coining down here from the Caelum (the stars), cosmological knowledge and healing knowledge, & ability at last to see the macro brain & its info traffic & finally the father (the abyss). This exchange fits the hermetic macro-microcosm universe, which, in my summary of my writing, I
should point out as a latent theme. This exchange would explain my performing (& knowing) the pristine early covert sacraments, & seating myself on the judgement seat. That’s why this began exactly on the day of Christ’s birth. & the sense of vast spaces: my inner space world now contained the cosmos itself, & of course seeing Zebra—that most of all.

  This is the mystery which Paul speaks of: “Christ in you (& you in Christ)”. Christ was born in me, literally him, and now firebright slumbers, the product of our union (with me as female host). (as impregnated bride, wedded to Christ as Bridegroom.)

  (1978)

  It’s odd that it’s mainly in the 3 Bantam books[175] that the truth (enough of it, anyhow) is told. Plus SCANNER & stories in the Ballantine collection[176]—all well-distributed. No time passes, in STIGMATA. Eternity can pass: infinite time. & Eldritch pollutes all the spurious worlds—due to a person taking a drug (cf. SCANNER).

  MAZE says, “Our actual reality is intolerable.” This will do, were TEARS not read. “So we willingly generate a group hallucination & live in it.” Gnosticism—& it is so.

  My writing deals with hallucinated worlds, intoxicating & deluding drugs, & psychosis. But my writing acts as an antidote, a detoxifying—not intoxicating— antidote. This is a fascinating realization. My writing deals with that which it lessens or dispels by—raising those topics to our conscious attention, esp. SCANNER & STIGMATA. Different partial collations print out somewhat different summations. One vast panorama is unveiled, as Ursula points out.[177] What an odd constituent POT-HEALER is!

  In the James-James dream I saw the PTG task force arriving silently & swiftly. So they must be close by, now (but to say “now” is to fall into the delusion of regarding linear time as real. They could be seconds away. But Palmer Eldritch can spin out his hallucinatory world & time for what seems—just seems—forever, for centuries. It’s like EYE when actual rescue is right at hand but they can’t wake up. Yes, we are asleep like they are in EYE & we must wake up & see past (through) the dream—the spurious world with its own time—to the rescue outside—outside now, not later. Perception of the PTG task force is not perception of a future event, but, as in EYE, of what is really there now.

  So EYE collates well with STIGMATA re spurious world, re being unconscious, re no real actual time elapsing (& probably, too, with MAZE). (In MAZE the salvific element reaching into our spurious world is treated so MAZE adds the crucial element to EYE which completes the picture). As in DO ANDROIDS, the savior seems to be fake (invented) but turns out to be real. Everything here is reversed; the real is fake and the fake is real. (the mirror effect.) After all, the master magician rules here, & has power over our perceptions. (As in STIGMATA.)

  (1978)

  STIGMATA is a Satanic Bible: the novel describes the Pattern proliferating itself in, on & through humans. By a study of STIGMATA one can understand transubstantiation, which was my source & theme (my intent). It’s even stated in the novel that Eldritch is the xtian God.

  You get a good deal of the story by combining UBIK & STIGMATA.

  But this is not an occluding, toxifying “virus ”—it is an antitoxic, de-occlusive.

  (1978)

  Ah! in UBIK locating the Ubik messages in cheap commercials was absolutely right on. I couldn’t have “guessed” more accurately. It’s obvious that the real author of UBIK was Ubik. It is a self proving novel; i.e., it couldn’t have come into existence unless it were true.[178]

  (1978)

  [T]he “information virus” Zebra destroys the 4-pronged deformation which I have delineated (supra-previous set of pages):

  1) It shows us the real world TEARS (abolishes the counterfeit world) MAZE

  2) It abolishes the inner occlusion SCANNER

  (restores our faculties as they are supposed to be)

  3) It breaks the “astral determinism” (It frees us) “Electric Ant”

  4) It removes amnesia “Impostor”

  (Restores true memory & hence true identity) In short, it turns us into the “Second Adam,” the restored xtian superman, a Christ. It abolishes the four aspects of our fallen nature. This is why the Gnostics believed in the salvific Gnosis; they confused the information with the information entity; i.e., they thought the former saved us, whereas it is the latter: living information, not the content of the information. However, the content is the pattern, so in a sense they were right. & it was an evil world (TEARS) & evil demiurge (ELDRITCH) that they believed in.

  real world: TEARS “Retreat Syndrome” “Precious Artifact”

  real deity: STIGMATA

  salvific entity: UBIK

  real situation: MAZE EYE JOINT

  our condition: SCANNER SHEEP WE CAN BUILD YOU our identity: “Impostor”

  our enslavement: “Electric Ant” PENULTIMATE TRUTH

  memory retrieval method: MITHC eleven novels, four stories (for openers)

  (1978)

  Leo Bulero defeating Palmer Eldritch is the savior/messenger (Son of Man) defeating the demiurge creator of this prison (& illusory) world. Breaking his power over man in UBIK, Runciter calling to Joe Chip is the savior calling to his human counterpart. This is also true in POT HEALER when Glimmung calls to Joe Fernwright.

  & Mercer & the Walker-on-Earth [in ANDROIDS] are one & the same. Deity takes trashy & even fake (sic) forms: Mercer, Glimmung, the UBIK commercials. SCANNER is a very serious book. Man’s present, unredeemed states—his ontological condition—of ignorance is depicted; this is not an aspect of his state but is (esse) his state. Opposed to this is the ontological state of knowledge (knowing) provided by Runciter & Ubik in UBIK. SCANNER focuses on the condition of ignorance dealt with more glibly in MAZE & UBIK; it goes into the anatomy of the occlusion—it really studies nothing else (no cosmology is presented). Mainly, it strives to show that we are fucked up in a way which precludes our being able to be aware of it—the most ominous kind of occlusion (ignorance). It points to the need of outside intervention.

  VALIS will be an attempt to show that intervention & redeemed state, but it is proving too difficult to write. This novel must be written, & I have the redeemed state of 2-74/2-75 to base it on, but God, what a task: to depict 1) that which redeems; 2) the process of redemption; 3) the redeemed (restored) state of man—in contrast to the occluded state (described in SCANNER). It could take the rest of my life to do it. I don’t know if I can. It must be divided into two parts: 1) unredeemed (& hen the entity which redeems & the process); & 2) the redeemed state. Like the “Siddhartha” 2-part book I dreamed about. Restored man—the Christ-man, the 2nd Adam. What a responsibility—what a task. But it must be done. & it must—like the “Siddhartha” book, point to the 5th Savior whose coming is imminent.

  (1978)

  In some respects, EYE is the most accurate of all: Great hunks of spurious time (events) are reeled out, whereas only seconds in RET (real elapsed time) have taken place. If we didn’t dream we could not even imagine such a thing, much less believe it.

  The theme of “they’re all out of it” appears in:

  1) EYE they’re unconscious & hallucinating various worlds.

  2) JOINT the world is fake—& the time is mistaken

  3) TMITHC it’s one of several worlds & not the real one

  4) TIME-SLIP fake psychotic realties

  5) STIGMATA fake malignant realities

  6) UBIK they’re dead & receiving messages from the real world

  7) MAZE they’re jointly hallucination [sic] a spurious world

  8) TEARS several competing worlds exist

  9) SCANNER the whole futuristic parts could be hallucinations & the protagonist lives in two different mutually exclusive worlds competing with each other

  Secondary false perceptions appear in:

  10) CLANS psychotic perceptions that compete

  11) GAME-PLAYERS levels of illusion for sinister purposes

  12) COSMIC PUPPETS one world underlying another (!)

  So one dozen novels & too many stories to count
narrate a message of one world obscuring or replacing another real one, spurious memories, & hallucinated (irreal) worlds. The message reads “Don’t believe what you see; it’s an enthralling—& destructive, evil snare. Under it is a totally different world, even placed differently along the linear time axis, & your memories are faked to jibe with the fake world (inner & outer congruency).

  JOINT opens with a telltale anachronism. Symptoms—or signs—unveiling the world as spurious abound. Strip the fake world away & another one appears, even set in a different time.

  & all this leads up to my 2-74 & 3-74 experience. It cannot be coincidence. My early knowledge of the basic Socratic and Presocratic dictum: “Don’t believe what you see; something else must actually be there.”

  (1978)

  He is here, not here, there, not there. Our whole reality is a hologram-like fake, & into & onto it in the guise of fakery, he substitutes the (truly) real. So the nonsense phenomena are real, & the substantial & normal & expected & sensible are not. Our criteria for distinguishing the real from the irreal are totally reversed: to us, the real is the solid, the heavy, the serious; & the irreal is St. Elmo’s fire, will-o-the-wisps. Amazing! If this be so, then my writing has been of value. Beyond the obvious contribution of indicting the universe as a forgery (& our memories also) & present[ing] the most accurate & stringent—rigorous—revised criteria to pull the truly real as set out of ground (love, making exceptions, humor, determination, etc., the little virtues). &, as Lem says, I somehow pile trash on trash until it “compresses” into something else: the mirror-opposite, “universe-seen-backward” insight is complete, as in POT HEALER.

  I believe the Savior is here. But disguised as well, that’s the hard part, isn’t it? To say how he’s disguised—how he appears in contrast to how we expect him to appear. He may resemble Runciter.